Every time the season changes from summer to fall, Aaron and I pack up the house, paint the house we are moving into, and unpack all our many truckloads of stuff! Back in good ole' 2004 when we built our brand new house, this did not seem to be in the forecast, however, this is how our first few years of marriage turned out. My dad said last night that if your marriage can survive a move then you have a good one. Well, we must have a fantastic one since we have moved for our third time! I would loved to have been planted in one house when we decided to move to the Bay Area, but that is not how it turned out. We started our alternative medicine practice in 2007 clear across town (to Kemah from Humble) and since then we have been and are being pruned to let go of our ego's. Gosh, we had such big ego's! I know God has a reason for everything and in our effort to live the American Dream we went from trying to have it all to realizing that is not what life is about.
December 31st, 2008 at 11:30 p.m. was a turning point in Aaron and mine's life. We gave all our dreams and ambitions to the LORD. Yes we grew up in church, went to church camp, all the youth events the churches in our town had and talked the talk, but now it had come to making a decision about what we were going to do with our life and it was time to start walking the walk. We knew what the Christian life was all about but we needed to surrender the daily life to Him. It is October now of 2009 and our lives our much more abounding in God's grace and love since we decided to put him first. I am realizing what God wrote to the churches in Revelation:
"To the church of Ephesus: "Nevertheless, I have this against you, that you have left your first love." Rev 2:4
"I know your works, that your are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of my mouth." Rev 3:15-16
Those are hard realities to swallow, but I know in my heart the changes of the season has come for my heart and soul. In this past few months I have not modeled Christ's love and I want to turn that around. If I can say sorry to those I hurt let me do that now, especially my husband. My role as his wife and partner in this life is to help him and be his crowning glory. For my children I want to be the best mom I can be knowing what their needs are, not mine above theirs. What grace our Father has lavished upon us that He sees Jesus' robes of white and not my ugly soiled clothing.
It is time for the fall to come, the leaves to change and drop, the colors of amber, shades of yellow ochre, hues of brown, and the setting of an array of greens to cover the earth. This is all happening in my heart and I know spring is coming, but not before the winter comes to let what needs to die, die.
